29 May 2010

Purses Versus Pockets

I first discovered the purse conspiracy in my early 20's. I had just made a job change from projectionist to cubicle rat and was forced to wear something other than Levi's 501's.

Much to my dismay, the already loathsome task of shopping for work clothes became more challenging. Let me lay it out for you:

As a down-to-earth kind of girl, all I carry around with me are my keys, a wallet and some chapstick. Sunglasses get stowed on the top of my head and back then I didn't own a cell phone. I found it increasingly difficult to find pants with real pockets, but back then I could still fit into Juniors-sized Dickies so I didn't worry to much about it.

A few years ago I noticed something odd happening to my lower half. Things didn't seem to be configured as they once were. I didn't gain weight, things just moved around.

These days, I'm forced to buy women's pants and I gotta tell you: I'm not loving it. Where are the pockets, people?

I honestly think it's a conspiracy with the purse industry. The Man will do anything to get my hard-earned money.

I shared this theory with a friend last night (a guy) but could not convince him.

I asked, "would you carry a purse?" His answer was of course, "No."

I asked, "would you buy pants without pockets?" Again, he answered (logically), "No."

Guys wouldn't tolerate this sort of thing, so why should I? It seems un-feminist. I'm afraid I have to invoke the "F" word here, but it seems like a serious equality issue.

No, really - it gets worse:

Have you ever compared the prices on men's and women's pants? Our pants always cost more - despite being made with less material.

Seriously, go check it out. Try Gap.com or Banana Republic.com. You'll see similar pants (linen-cotton blend, for example) are $10 more for women.

Am I the only one who thinks this higher pricing and no pocket thing is total bullshit?

I know there are purse-less women out there. Can I get a witness?!?

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